Christmas

Christmas Day is nearly over, but it's the first chance I've had to sit quietly in front of the fire, alone with my thoughts and able to post something. Thank you to those of you who made comments lately, especially those who described vivid memories of Mom.

Dad arrived in Pittsburgh on the 23rd and stayed with Grant and Deborah through Christmas Eve. After our respective church services we all met at Grant and Deborah's for fondue, sushi, and shrimp. A particularly poignant part of the evening was gathering around Miles as he listened to the recorded story "Twas the Night Before Christmas" that Mom had read to him in time for Christmas last year. This morning Dad, John, and I woke up at our house, drank coffee and ate cinnamon rolls, then opened stockings. Grant's family joined us later in the day along with Mom's dad, Scott. Before we opened presents as a family Dad led us in a reflection for Mom where we lit candles and read sayings about keeping loved ones' memories alive. Miles and Claire laughed and threw wrapping paper everywhere as they opened gifts, and we all enjoyed sharing in their delight. Mom would have been giddy with excitement and loved that we were all together. After a dinner of pork tenderloin and delicious side dishes we watched home movies until the kids got sleepy. We were blessed with a day of togetherness.

Last Christmas, Mom insisted that it was her final celebration of the holiday she loved so much. She had a sense, I'm sure, of her body slowly accepting defeat. Her spirit, however, couldn't be defeated, and it was that spirit that we celebrated around the dinner table and as we sat by the crackling fire.

I hope that today each of you spent time with those you love and treated that time like a treasured gift. And though it might not be sound theology, I hope that Mom saw Miles smile and Claire run toward the tree and all of us gather around to hold each other as close as we could.

My mom was such a great hostess. I remember watching her seamlessly put elegant and flavorful dinners on the table, never seeming to serve the same dish twice. At the same time she managed to be so much fun annd make everyone feel welcome. There wasn't a dinner party without a theme or a game or two to break the ice when the guests arrived.

I threw a small get-together last night for a dozen friends, and the whole time I longed for my mom to be on the other end of the phone, giving me advice on my table settings or helping me create a mental checklist, or just listening as I recalled the guests and the conversation. She would have remembered every detail, and even though these friends are people I went to college with and only see once a year she would have been able to distinguish them. She listened and paid attention to detail like no one I have ever known.

Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad. We still celebrate the union you shared.