There is hardly a situation in my life where I don't, at some point, think about what my mom would do or say, how she would advise. I am amazed at how, over the last few months, even the simplest of daily activities or happenings draws my mind toward her. All the little things that add up to form my days used to seem so insignificant, but now I wish I could bottle them all up and just for one moment have her here with me so I could show her or tell her or ask her. I have been missing the contact with all of you and wanted to update you on life since August.
My dad is keeping very busy. His social calendar is packed every night, and he's been initiating some new groups/Bible studies at church. He plays tennis every chance he gets and has been visiting often with his family in Lancaster. John and I got to see him a few weeks ago when we attended my cousin's engagement party in Baltimore, and we are all looking forward to being together at the beginning of November when my dad visits Pittsburgh for the annual fundraising banquet for the pregnancy center where I work.
Grant, Deborah, Miles, and Claire are busy with a variety of activities as well; Grant with teaching and coaching, Deborah with chasing Claire--who can walk now--and keeping up with Miles--who now seems to know a million words. This past weekend Grant, Deborah, John and I met PapPap (Mom's dad) at the cottage to close it up for the season and were able to catch up with him a little bit. He seems to be doing very well. We enjoyed taking the kids on a hayride despite the dreary weather.
John and I continue to get settled in our house. John's younger daughter, Abby, is busy applying to college and going to Homecoming and working and just being a senior. We have a great time attending her varied activities. I have joined the Junior Women's Club of Pittsburgh (which would really make my mom smile) and am trying out a new Bible study aimed at pairing younger women with older ones as a sort of mentor/mentee relationship. I have begun editing college admissions essays for juniors and seniors and enjoy the extra pocket money.
I am very aware that keeping busy can only distract from the grieving process but can't heal me.
The readers of this blog are never far from my thoughts. You each have made a profound impression. My heart is comforted when I think of the ways you each might be keeping Mom's memory alive.
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Nadine so glad you posted on the blog. Not a day goes by that David or I keep looking at the pictures and rereading the different entrys. Sometime I think maybe it just a dream. Your Mom touched so many and David and I both enjoy being back in Philly, and recalling the times we spent on our way through the area, how your parents were such great hosts.
ReplyDeleteThe service for your mom was such a uplifting experience and joy to attend. It was so good to see you all, what a beautiful family. Recalling the many thing we did together as our family were growing, it amazing how God works.
We will continue to keep you in our prayers, and hope time will heal your broken hearts.
Thanks Nadine..I appreciate your words.
ReplyDeleteThanks for keeping us updated, Nadine. Though perhaps not as often as you, I'm reminded of your mother all the time, too. There are places throughout Roxborough where I think of something particularly funny that happened or something she said. Her childhood friend's speech at the memorial service served as a lesson for me that these memories are meant to be joyful treasures, not morose and painful reminders. I confess to having difficulty in treating the deaths of friends as a painless event. You have helped take some of the sting out of it, though. I hope the love we all had for your Mom takes some of the sting out for you.
ReplyDeleteJay Feinschil
Will, Nadine, Grant, & family, there's so much I still want to say, and so little time before Thanksgiving tomorrow. I know you're facing 2 more difficult "firsts" in the next week -- your first Thanksgiving without Deb, and Will, your first wedding anniversary Dec. 1 without her. I'm sure you're all trying to find that healthy balance of activity without Deb, having innumerable memories, and enjoying beautiful, funny Miles & Claire whose faces light up this blog.
ReplyDeleteWith love & prayers,
B.J.